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Friday, November 19, 2010

The Journey has begun!!!!

Well,  It has been a week since I found out I am positive for BRCA II.  My percentage is 87% for breast cancer and 28% for ovarian cancer.  However, it is really important that I remove my ovaries, because the hormones they produce cause cancer in the breasts.  If I have a hysterectomy and mastectomy my chances decrease by 90%, so it is an easy solution for me- have the surgeries!

Truthfully, the journey began over a year ago when my cousin was diagnosed with breast cancer and has positive results for BRCA II.  Her dad, my uncle, passed away with cancer as well as my father and their mother (my paternal grandmother).  So, grandma had the gene, gave it to my dad and uncle, who then passed it onto my cousin and I.  My other uncles have not been tested nor any of their children.  My brother has not been tested either.  I have passed the information onto them and I am at peace with my responsibility to give them the info and support them in their decisions.

As for this last week, I am not able to concentrate on anything.  My mind is constantly thinking about my risk, percentages, options, making doctor appointments, reading message boards, and just constantly thinking thinking thinking!!  Almost too much for me the wrap my mind around.  I had a few blue days and just wanted to be alone.  Watched a movie with my hubby and cuddled up to him.  Didn't want to do much.  I feel I have to show others I am doing fine to reassure them, I guess that is my nurturing/mother instinct.

I have my gyn-oncologist consultation for Dec. 2nd.  I have no idea what to expect.  I know I want to have a hysterectomy with ovaries out.  I am wondering if they will agree, how soon I can have the surgery, how long will I be in the hospital, how long is recovery, etc.  I hope they can do it through laparoscopic surgery.  I have my breast consultation on Jan 25th, a much longer wait- Aarrghhh!  Just want it to be done, but know I need this time to get my self mentally prepared- if that is possible.

I called my family doctor and told his nurse my test results as the doctor wanted to know (he referred me to the testing) and I told her about all the anxiety I am having.  She said she would talk with him about the anxiety I am having and see what he says.  I hope I can have something to relax my mind at this point until I can deal with it more rationally as time passes.

I guess it is a waiting game at this point.  13 more days until my ovarian consultation!!!

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